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Monthly Archives: June 2014

on fireBeing “all in” means that you are going to burn your boat at the shore.  Think about it.  As an entrepreneur, I believe that either you’re in or you’re not. Earlier this week I posted Believe In Yourself encouraging everyone to believe in their own passion and determination as the foundation of starting a business or change in life.

What have you committed to that there is no turning back?  As an example, many of us are parents and being a parent provides an analogy for being an entrepreneur.  From the first second of a child’s birth, they are dependent on someone else to care for them…basically, they are an unproductive employee (but a long term investment). Food, clothing, housing, teaching, and every facet of care is the responsibility of the parents for years of commitment.  A parent is the most important entrepreneurial venture in the world and frankly one of the most difficult.  It’s also not meant for everyone.

Now think about your current position.  While teaching CEU’s for a state funeral association group at their annual convention last week, I asked “do you write the check or do you get the check” meaning is the money yours or someone else’s (owner or employee)?  How would you work differently today if you had to write your own check?  What if you had to pay for your co-workers productivity?  Would you make sure the funeral is paid for if it was your money that paid the bills including your salary?  Have you fully committed by burning your boat at the shore for the person that’s paying you?  If you believe in yourself and capabilities, even if you don’t write the check, act like it’s yours.  If not, you aren’t ready to burn your boat at the shore.

I’m blessed to be associated with partner’s and fellow entrepreneurs that have burned their boats at the shore as well.  They possess a fundamental belief in themselves; they had a vision and now they are executing.  For some reading this, I know there are thoughts that burning the boat at the shore in Aruba wouldn’t be all that bad.  However, like the old saying goes about breakfast, “who is more committed, the chicken producing the egg or the pig producing the bacon?” From the onset, the entrepreneur lives a life of sacrifice; time spent with family, “free time”, personal finances and is the last in line.  In the military as an Officer, we always ate last…the troops always get fed first because they are the most essential to the mission, without them, no battles or wars are won.  But more often than not, the troops never recognize this act.

I have burned my boat at the shore; I’ve eaten all the provisions I brought with me, learned how to shelter myself, eaten from whatever I could kill or pick, and now I can see why I came to this foreign land of being an entrepreneur.  I took the risk, I committed, and there is no turning back. Soon, I’ll share what’s been built.  I burned my boat at the shore, thank God.  Cheers y’all! #thefuneralcommander

Gotta Be MeAs an entrepreneur, I can testify that I have fundamental belief in myself and I posses a relentless passion to convert my visions into execution.  That’s quite daunting when coordinating, funding, explaining, training, developing, and forecasting is a daily occurrence. Nothing is accomplished by yourself. It’s not a matter of relying on others, but the ability to infuse those that you depend on to have the same sense of passion and clearly defining the vision in order to achieve execution.  So, if you are one that desires to make a dream reality, you must first believe in yourself.  I know many that read this will think “well, I do believe in myself, but ____________.”

Robert F. Kennedy said “Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.”  We all have fear of failure, but why?  Is it because we are afraid what others will say or think of us when we fall?  Some of my biggest doubters have been those that live under the blanket of security from their current position, yet they wouldn’t dare leave that blanket behind.  “Happiness is when you feel good about yourself without feeling the need for anyone else’s approval.” ― Unknown.  Do you really need permission to succeed and be happy? Yes, it’s frightening to think of the financial disaster, being ridiculed by family, colleagues and friends by “see, I told you shouldn’t have.”

I had a friend call me for advice about her son.  He is a young man that has been well trained professionally and working at a local business. The young man felt that at his current job he was unappreciated and the leadership had no sense of excellence nor appreciation for his contributions to making their brand better.  An opportunity to move to another city and a big time entity within the same brand was laid before him.  The mom explained that he was really struggling with “leaving what he knows behind for a chance that may not ultimately work out” because the offer was conditional on a 90 day trial.  I told her that if he does not think he’s good enough, then stay where he is; if he believes in himself, there is no doubt what he should do. He made the move and performing excellently.

I’m on the cusp of launching what some may deem impossible.  Nothing is impossible if you believe in yourself and surround yourself with people that accept accountability and share your passion.  Much can be accomplished if common goal is the enterprise, not the individual recognition.   You only have one life…believe in yourself and others will too…Cheers y’all. #thefuneralcommander

ASDI have the opportunity to travel across the country interacting with funeral home owners as well as owners of companies that provide various services and products to the funeral industry.  As large as our industry seems to be, it’s a relatively small group of companies and people that provide products and services to funeral homes.  Being a funeral home owner/partner and part of the vendor world, I truly enjoy having conversations with others about their views of the “temperature” in the funeral business from a vendor perspective along with their particular company positions about offerings to our customers, funeral homes.

Earlier this week, I had the opportunity to spend some time with Kevin Czachor of Answering Service for Directors (ASD) at a state convention expo.   If you don’t know Kevin or ASD, on a simplistic definition, ASD is a family owned and operated business that provides answering services for funeral homes.  However, saying ASD is just an answering service is like saying the Marines are just a group of soldiers.

Family owned and operated at ASD means that Kevin’s 11 year old daughter accompanied him at the convention and was quite the pleasant young lady at their booth.  Frankly, she was more attentive and engaging than many in other booths that were sitting behind tables with bowls full of candy, brochures, pens and not offering any engagement other than brief eye contact with a nod.  A while back, I visited ASD’s operations center in Pennsylvania meeting key staff including Kevin’s sister Kathy and brother Marty.  Besides the impressive surroundings of technology one would imagine CIA headquarters would look like (I’ll address this later), the genuine reception, tour and engagement of the staff is an obvious testament to the culture of service by the Czachor family.

I believe that a company is defined by it’s leadership.  Creating the service and product is undeniably important; however consistent performance, growth, training, customer engagement, and respect is not achieved by happenstance.  In the military we called it “command influence and intent.” Basically, if leaders create a climate of example and expectations, the troops will follow.

ASD is doing it right.  Training, technology, work environment, opportunity and respect is provided to all staff which translates into a culture within their workforce of service to their customers.  The use of technology and thirst for seeking solutions for their customers is part ASD’s success as evidenced in their operations center.  Interestingly, you don’t have to take a trek to Pennsylvania, you can see for yourself by visiting http://www.myasd.com/tour.  Technology anyone?  ASD is one of the few funeral industry service companies that actually use and excel with social media messaging.  Jessica Fowler offers interesting insights about ASD, it’s employees and customers along with sharing relevant information about the funeral industry on a regular basis.

If you regularly read my blog I share my perspectives about the funeral industry.  I have been part of a big public funeral product manufacturing company, I have developed from scratch successful funeral homes with proprietary operating platforms, and I have created funeral related service and product companies.  My past military experience offered me the ability to provide relevant funeral director training that produces measurable results.  Whether you agree or dislike my particular sharing of observations, you know that I’m not just “shooting from the hip.”

So why am I writing this post?  Hand’s down, ASD is doing it right in the funeral industry and frankly as funeral home owners and industry suppliers we should take note.  As funeral home owners/management we can learn about developing a real culture of service.  As suppliers, a thirst for finding new services to better our customers operations and profitability should be at the top of our list every day.

I did not ask for permission or let anyone at ASD including Kevin know that I was writing this post, but after my last conversation with him, I was inspired to share my thoughts.  If they give me some flak, it won’t be the first time in my life, I’ve actually been shot at and dodged SCUD missiles before.  Along with my often recalcitrant posts, I am a believer also in providing deserving kudos…this one, to ASD; they are doing it right.  Cheers y’all! #thefuneralcommander.

cheap funeralOver the weekend I was at a social gathering and the host introduced my wife and I to 8 others we were meeting for the first time.  When I was asked about my profession, the subject matter turned to funerals.  After finding out I was in the funeral business, almost in unison, they exclaimed “I want the cheapest funeral possible” followed by sentiments of disdain from recent experiences of burying their parents. Interestingly, the people at the table were the “target” Baby Boomers (I’m in this category, however these folks are about 15 years my senior) that are supposed to want “so much more” for their life celebration and these folks were not anywhere near financially challenged.

So I asked them what they thought the “cheapest funeral” would be in terms of cost and service.  One lady shared that she just buried her husband last year and she hated the entire process.  She said that going to the funeral home with her kids and in her words “consternation of dealing with those people” left a bad taste in her mouth.  She said that she told her kids that in no way shape or form does she want them to go through the same process….”I told them to just cremate me and have a party at the lake house…I paid over $12,000 for the whole thing and I’ll haunt my kids if they waste that much on me.”

Another lady said “I don’t want anyone looking at me dead in a casket” followed by “just cremate me…what does that cost about $1,000.”  I told her in this particular area that cremation is anywhere from $1600 to about $3500.  With that, more discussion ensued around cremation.  One interesting point a gentleman made was that he had been considering selling his burial family burial plots. “I don’t like visiting a cemetery and I know my kids don’t and won’t…why waste the money?”  From there went the discussion of where cremated remains should rest…from putting them in the lake to scattering in the garden (I suggested they research viable locations before making a decision).  I shifted the discussion to what type of service…almost all said that they don’t want to be in a church or a funeral home.  From the lake house to the country club, the general consensus was to have some sort of party, but nothing dour for this group.

I was frankly surprised at the positions of those at the table.  These were relatively affluent people that had defined opinions from recent experiences.  Their candid sharing of thoughts was interesting…what are yours about the conversation?  Cheers y’all! #thefuneralcommander

 

like respectI have been around the proverbial block of leadership in my life from both positions of leader and follower.  Just recently I was having this discussion with one of my partners about behavior modification in funeral homes.  Behavior modification is quite simply changing poor habits and continuous ineffective or unproductive behaviors.  Funeral director training is a behavior modification tool that alleviates continuous ruts.

However, funeral director training is one thing, actually conducting and coaching is quite another.  In our discussion, the topic of like versus respect was broached.  A challenge for many funeral home owners is the difficulty of operating in a close environment.  Conversely, how do other organizations seem to efficiently function in similar “close quarters?”  We discussed an example of a particular funeral home owner that struggles to “take command of his troops” even for the overall good of their firm.  The firm as mired in a continuous struggle for profitability and lacks consistent revenue performance from the revenue makers…funeral directors. The owner just doesn’t want to “rock the boat” which means he fears making necessary decisions, training and performance demands because he may “upset someone” thus not being perceived as “their friend.”  We have both heard many times )I just can’t do that; these people are my friends.”

Another example we discussed is being a parent.  Making decisions as a parent is often adverse to how friends would interact.  However, the inability to make often life decisions for the sake of “being a friend” may have severe consequences for the child over time.

So for the sake of discussion, which would you rather be as a leader, liked or respected?  I believe there are circumstances for both; certainly my answer would be that I would like to be liked and respected.  Let’s narrow this down to the work environment in a funeral home. Would you rather work in an environment and culture of like or respect?  What’s your choice? Cheers Y’all.

 

53 years53 years.  No more battles to fight, no countries to defend, no oppressed people to free. I remember years ago reading about what happens to men when we get older.  We go from being dangerous warriors seeking battles to fight, running with the ball or tackling the ones that carry it.  It’s happened…now I watch young warriors returning from foreign lands and men playing football on my big screen television.

I am 53 years old today and reflective.  I looked at my uniform now hanging in the closet under plastic (yes it still fits), but it’s not for me to wear anymore.  Frankly, the medals don’t mean anything to anyone else but me now; they are only history.  My greatest successes are not pinned on that uniform, rather they are experiences only I realize…

3.3Like being married to the love of my life for 30 years; many would say that she is one that deserves all the medals.  I am the father of two sons; both very much like me but so different in many ways…actually better than me. At their early age they have already demonstrated more than I about love, pursuit of happiness and individualism.

Over my adult years I have worn many uniforms, performed different jobs and taken on some pretty lofty projects.  I developed a personal mantra of “a vision is only a dream without execution.”  I have dreamed, had visions and executed…I have also failed.

It’s odd coming to the realization that you’re closer to the end than the beginning. I’m not going to put on that uniform for service ever again and I’m not going to tackle the guy carrying the ball.  But let me tell you what I am going to do:

I’m going to keep loving the woman that gave me her life and life to my sons.  I’m going to be the dad that challenges my sons to reach their potential; but they never have to look behind them because I have their back.  I’m going to execute my visions in the funeral industry and challenge those around me to elevate themselves beyond the norm.  I’m still going to be brought to tears when I hear Toby Keith’s “American Soldier.”   I’m still going to say to new people that I work with “I’m not going to say anything to offend you on purpose; when I want to offend you, you’ll be certain that I wanted to.”    I’m still going to love a good debate. I’m going to keep writing what comes to my mind, expressing my opinion and challenge others to take a stand.

Bugaloe blissI’m going to take care of myself which includes playing golf, smoking cigars and drinking dark rum straight on the rocks with a lime. I’m going to live 50 weeks a year so that I can live for 2 weeks in Aruba…like life should be lived.  53 is a new number for me; the number of consecutive push-ups I require of myself in the mornings just because I can.  I’m not going away easily.  I think I’ll just keep being me.  Cheers y’all! #thefuneralcommander

 

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