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Memorial Day Story: Coffee, Ink & Tears

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American Soldier, Memorial Day
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Ink

A few weeks ago I made my trek cross-country from Virginia to Arizona to start a new position with The Foresight Companies.  In the back of a 10×10 U-Haul was enough furniture to fill a one-bedroom apartment, my clothes along with living essentials.  My wife proclaimed that if I ever decided to leave her, the truck held everything I would have.  A single day of unloading, unpacking and sorting placed me into my new digs. By early evening I was pretty much set up – even pictures hung.

The next morning, I had to go grocery shopping so I made a list to avoid wandering aimlessly in the aisles wondering what I should buy.  Because of an early morning AO (area of operations) re-con, I knew of a nearly new grocery store about a mile away.  Upon arriving, and since I had no coffee, I found the convenient Starbucks just inside the front entrance.

It was early morning as I had yet to adjust to the Mountain Time zone.  The coffee shop was empty of patrons and I was greeted by a young, smiling gal asking what she may provide for me.  As I gave her my order, I noticed on her right forearm was an unusual tattoo – a banner with Semper Fi atop a flower.  This ink caught my eye because I wondered if she was a Vet; not many Marine Corps tats are adorned with a flower.

So I inquire of her, “Are you a former Marine?”  She answered, “No, but my brother was.”  I asked where and when he served and she told only a few years…and then shared that he was killed in a helicopter crash in Afghanistan.  Tears shot out of my eyes.  I asked her to please tell me about him.

Courtney told me that Justin was killed in a helicopter crash along with several other Marines during Iraq Freedom.  She went on to share that she honors his service and, as a daily reminder of him, got the tattoo.  For those that know me well, there are some subjects that I become emotional over and cannot hold back tears; young people dying for our Country is one of them.

As she made my coffee we chatted a bit and I told her I’m new to town.  Courtney told me where important things were located like shopping areas, good local eats and such.  As she handed me the coffee, she too had tears in her eyes, making mine flow again.  I thanked her for sharing Justin with me, his sacrifice for our freedom, and her kindness to an old sobbing Vet.  I asked Courtney if I could share her story, and she agreed.

I wanted to share this story for a few reasons.  First, pay attention and engage people because everyone has a story.  Second, “those people” with ink have depth (I’m tatted myself).  Finally, God has a way to let you know you are in the right place.  I would have never known about Justin’s sacrifice for our freedom if I had not traveled all the way across our fantastic country, eventually finding myself simply in need of coffee and groceries that first early morning. I’m grateful that Courtney is my barista and friend.

In Memory of Captain Chris Cash.  He gave the ultimate sacrifice June 24, 2004 in Baqubah Iraq. RIP my fellow NCMA Alum.

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For all those that gave the ultimate sacrifice, thank you.  For the rest of us, please take a moment to be grateful.  Our freedom did not come for free.  Happy Memorial Day.

From the Command Post (West), Cheers Y’all! #thefuneralcommander

Veterans Day 2015; We Made An Oath.

November 11, 2015
American Soldier, Leadership, Oath of Office, Veterans Day
5 Comments

I swear

Below is the oath by those that serve (or have served us, Commissioned Officer slightly different) in the US Military:

“I, _____, do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice. So help me God.”

These collection of words have been affirmed by so many that provide us the freedoms we enjoy today as Americans.  To support and defend.  True faith and allegiance.  Obey orders.  Follow the regulations.  All with the help of God.  This oath is a commitment to serve something bigger than ourselves; our God, our fellow citizens and those that make this choice alongside us.  A cause to die for.

Veterans Day 2015 means that we continue to live in a free country.  This past year many Veterans from earlier generations have died and we currently have citizens are serving us now in harms way. Veterans Day is to honor all that took the oath of office to serve us in our Armed Forces. Veterans Day is for the men and women that offered to give their life for us whether they served in combat on foreign soil, stateside, active duty or reserve. Let me be clear; it’s not first responders day.  My salute to Veterans that served before, alongside and after me.  Thank you for your service and sacrifices to our Nation.

2Lt. Jeff Harbeson, 1984

     2LT Jeff Harbeson, 1984 

Thank a Veteran, they are willing to die for you.  May God continue to Bless America. From the Command Post and the fog of cigar smoke, Cheers Y’all! #thefuneralcommander

Veteran’s Day 2014; “Skin in the Game”

November 10, 2014
American Soldier, Veterans Day
3 Comments
2Lt. Jeff Harbeson, 1984

2Lt. Jeff Harbeson, 1984

It’s the eve of Veterans Day 2014 and this particular day of honor, I become even more patriotically emboldened regarding our great Country.  Yes, I am a flag waving believer in the foundations and Veterans that provide us the freedoms we enjoy.  On Sunday, I was watching a news show and the CEO of Starbucks and author of the book For Love of Country, Howard Schultz was being interviewed.  Mr. Schultz said “Two and a half million extraordinary young men and women have served for the last ten, 15 years in an all-volunteer service. As a result of that, most of America, 98% have not had real skin in the game. We need to have a conversation, be empathetic, be understanding, and do everything we possibly can across the country, in rural America and every town, to hire a veteran.”

His phrase “skin in the game” really struck me and I consider his words profoundly honoring to all Veterans.  To have “skin in the game” one must give something of value and take a risk of achieving a goal.  Yes there are rewards for having skin in the game, but the risk of losing the skin that you put in the game is a real possibility as well.   Our Americans  with real skin in the game come from every walk of life, ethnic group, and from the poorest to the most wealthy zip codes.  But here is the underlying difference between our Veterans and everyone else; they volunteer to put their skin in the game.  They raise their right hand and swear that they will actually support and defend our way of life, even if it means giving their own life.  A US Veteran is anyone that took the oath and not exclusive to combat duty; if they served under this promise, they had “skin in the game.”  Below is the oath:

“I (name), do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will be true faith and allegiance to the same, and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to regulations and The Uniform Code of Military Justice.  So help me God.”

Our Nation is grateful for the sacrifice and we have a national debt to honor our commitments for Veteran recognition, education and health care.  Our history is our history because of Veterans.  Upon returning from duty after World War II, Veterans used their skills, work ethic and education opportunities to build what we now know as the middle class.  Since then, nothing has changed because our young Veterans today have even better skills with an understanding of hard work and commitment; they deserve to be first in line for the job, period.

Please watch this video by USAA:  Especially on Veterans Day, when you see a Veteran, step up and thank them for their service.  After all, they put their skin in the game for you and your family.

Hunter HarbesonI have respect for those that served before me, alongside me and serve today.  I am proud that over the years my family put skin in the game to make this Country great and we are still doing so today with my oldest son’s service. From an old Veteran; to all of my fellow Vets that also put their skin in the game, my salute to you and my undying support, So help me God. From the Command Post:  Cheers y’all!  #thefuneralcommander

An American Soldier…A Memorial Day Story.

May 23, 2014
American Soldier, Memorial Day, Thoughts
3 Comments

ACaptains 1 few years back a friend of mine and I took the trek to Washington DC over the Memorial Day Holiday to participate in Rolling Thunder.  If you don’t know about Rolling Thunder, its a gathering of Veterans on their motorcycles to honor fellow Veterans that served, still serving and keep the message alive that American POW’s are still unaccounted for.  As a Veteran, I can personally attest to the reverence and emotional feeling being around over 500,000 people that have given so much, but recognized very little.  We speak to each other with honor as we converse; whether a Veteran of Vietnam or the Middle East conflicts, we get it.

My friend Steve Hughes earned a Bronze Star and had retired with over 20 years of service, however he was still carrying quite a bit in his “ruck sack” from his days in combat…I knew this particular trip among other Veterans would prove “freeing” in some ways that are hard to explain to those that have not walked the paths of combat.  We loaded up our bikes and headed up I-81 with other Vets to DC for the weekend on a Friday before Memorial Day.  Arriving on Friday afternoon, we explored some of the venues where events were to take place and just basically performing a “recon” of the area.

On Saturday morning, we got up all excited for what the day would bring and headed out for breakfast.  The particular restaurant we chose was full of Veterans…all wearing vests or hats with medals and patches that only fellow Vets recognize and know the meaning.  As we finished our meal, we were walking out the door when a couple came up to us and asked “is this photo yours?”  It was a photo of my oldest son Hunter in his Hargrave Military Academy uniform…it had fallen from my money clip.  I thanked them, and they asked about the photo and uniform.  I shared with them that Hunter is my oldest son and is a student at HMA.

The couple asked “are you guys here for Rolling Thunder?”  Steve and I shared the story of our friendship.  He was an Officer Candidate at OCS and I was his TAC Officer (drill instructor) many years ago…normally not the great start of a friendly relationship.  After he graduated, I eventually retired and we were not in contact with each other until one day I read a story in a local paper about a boy that was receiving his Dad’s Masters Degree at a university because his Dad was serving in Iraq.  Ended up, it was Steve’s son Josh.  Steve I and I reconnected via email…he in the desert and I in the US.  Steve assisted me on a program I started for a local football team…tagged “Band of Brothers.”

We continued to explain that the “Band of Brothers” was a connector of a high school football team to a combat unit overseas.  The team made specific t-shirts that only we could wear (I was the team Chaplain)..but we also sent shirts to Steve’s unit in Iraq.  Before we took the field for each game, I would provide the players motivation with a mixture of gospel and military talks…there is a direct correlation between battle, fighting for a cause with another, and a belief in something bigger than yourself.  We prayed for Steve’s unit on their battlefield…on the other side of the world at the exact same time, members of Steve’s Infantry unit prayed for our team as we took to our “battlefield.”  We finished our story with a few events of that experience including winning the State 4A football championship that year…and that Steve and I were there just to be together with other Veterans to honor and remember.

I asked the couple if they lived locally and they responded no…they were from out of town and there to visit their son at Arlington.  “Arlington” I asked, “is he stationed there?”  “No” the mother said; “he is buried there.”  With an immediate and almost convulsing rush of emotion, tears shot from my eyes…as they are right now as I write this story.  “Our son was killed during a river crossing in 2003 while serving in Iraq…vehicles turned over and he died trying to save other soldiers.”  Steve and I stood there crying…without any words we hugged and cried thanking these parents for their sons sacrifice for our freedom.  They told us more about their boy and we completed our extemporaneous memorial service in the parking lot.  I gave the mother the picture of my son Hunter and asked her to place his photo on the grave of their son..to honor him. The rest of the weekend seemed to be a blur of emotional conversations and sharing much of the past that only warriors understand.

I share this real life event because Memorial Day is upon us…yes, it’s great to have a day off Monday going to the beach, cooking out, playing golf or just plain resting.  But the day is really to remember sacrifices of those that gave their all for us.

I dedicate this story and the song by Toby Keith below to the memory of Captain Chris Cash, a fellow NCMA graduate who gave his life June 24, 2004 for our Freedom.  Take a few moments to listen to the words…the song was played at Chris’s funeral.

When you see one of us this weekend wearing our uniform, hat, vest or shirt that you may not understand all the insignias, but clearly identifies the wearer as a Veteran…thank them.  They probably have a story too.  Happy Memorial Day…cheers y’all.

 

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